Dudley's dungeon

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Friday, 26 June, 2009 by Slandor
Dogley picks up a   
scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone,
With many a scalding tear and many a groan,
When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand,
Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand.
I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd
Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd--
I caught a finger: but the downward weight
O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate
The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst
The comfortable sun. I was athirst
To search the book, and in the warming air
Parted its dripping leaves with eager care.
Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on
My soul page after page, till well-nigh won
Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied,
I read these words, and read again, and tried
My eyes against the heavens, and read again.
        [ Endymion, by John Keats ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
labeled READ ME. }}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}} ...}}}}}..........}} .}}}}}}........@...} }}..}}}}..d.......}} }}...}}}}........}}} }}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
d "Ahem, ahem, ahem. To prove to the other site that we indeed have the finest jokes..."
It is not so easy to
open this tin"You know salmon, Sarge," said Nobby.
"It is a fish of which I am aware, yes."
"You know they sell kind of slices of it in tins..."
"So I am given to understand, yes."
"Weell...how come all the tins are the same size? Salmon
gets thinner at both ends."
"Interesting point, Nobby. I think-"
        [ Soul Music, by Terry Pratchett ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
. .}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}} ...}}}}}..........}} .}}}}}}........@...} }}..}}}}..d.......}} }}...}}}}........}}} }}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
d "...we've prepared something truly select for you today. It involves relativity theory..."
It smells like      
spotted jellies.    
Eat it? (y/n) y     
}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}}
...}}}}}..........}}
.}}}}}}........@...}
}}..}}}}..d.......}}
}}...}}}}........}}}
}}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
d "...Greek mythology, existentialist philosophy, the history of India..."
You consume dried   
spotted jelly.      
.}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}}
...}}}}}..........}}
.}}}}}}........@...}
}}..}}}}..d.......}}
}}...}}}}........}}}
}}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
d "...and some basic HTML. We think you'll like it. We find ourselves on the HealerI swear by Apollo the physician, and Aesculapius, and Health,
and All-heal, and all the gods and goddesses, that, according
to my ability and judgment, I will keep this Oath and this
stipulation -- to reckon him who taught me this Art equally dear
to me as my parents, to share my substance with him, and relieve
his necessities if required; to look upon his offspring in the
same footing as my own brothers, and to teach them this art, if
they shall wish to learn it, without fee or stipulation; and
that by precept, lecture, and every other mode of instruction,
I will impart a knowledge of the Art to my own sons, and those
of my teachers, and to disciples bound by a stipulation and oath
according to the law of medicine, but to none others. I will
follow that system of regimen which, according to my ability and
judgment, I consider for the benefit of my patients, and abstain
from whatever is deleterious and mischievous. [...]
        [ Hippocrates' Oath, translated by Francis Adams ]

PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our
dogs when well.
        [ The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
questMany, possibly most, Tours are organized as a Quest. This
is like a large-scale treasure hunt, with clues scattered
all over the continent, a few false leads, Mystical Masters
as game-show hosts, and the Dark Lord and the Terrain to
make the Quest interestingly difficult. [...]
In order to be assured of your future custom, the Management
has a further Rule: Tourists, far from being rewarded for
achieving their Quest Object, must then go on to conquer
the Dark Lord or set about Saving the World, or both. And
why not? By then you will have had a lot of practice in
that sort of thing and, besides, the Quest Object is usually
designed to help you do it.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
, where..."
You hear a blast.   
You smell marsh gas!
Dogley coughs.      
}}}}}}}}}.###}}}}}}}
...}}}}}.#####....}}
.}}}}}}.#######@...}
}}..}}}}.#####....}}
}}...}}}}.###....}}}
}}}}}}}}}}.#..}}}}}}
d *hack wheeze*
Zap what? r         
r - a wand of'Saruman!' he cried, and his voice grew in power and authority.
'Behold, I am not Gandalf the Grey, whom you betrayed. I am
Gandalf the White, who has returned from death. You have no
colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.'
He raised his hand, and spoke slowly in a clear cold voice.
'Saruman, your staff is broken.' There was a crack, and the
staff split asunder in Saruman's hand, and the head of it
fell down at Gandalf's feet. 'Go!' said Gandalf. With a cry
Saruman fell back and crawled away.
        [ The Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
fire. .}}}}}}}}}}#}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}.###}}}}}}} ...}}}}}.#####....}} .}}}}}}.#######@...} }}..}}}}.#####....}} }}...}}}}.###....}}} }}}}}}}}}}.#..}}}}}}
d "Wait, what?"
A towerTowers (_brooding_, _dark_) stand alone in Waste Areas and
almost always belong to Wizards. All are several stories high,
round, doorless, virtually windowless, and composed of smooth
blocks of masonry that make them very hard to climb. [...]
You will have to go to a Tower and then break into it at some
point towards the end of your Tour.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
of flame erupts! .}}}}}}}}}}-}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}./-\}}}}}}} ...}}}}}.//-\\....}} .}}}}}}.|||^|||@...} }}..}}}}.\\-//....}} }}...}}}}.\-/....}}} }}}}}}}}}}.-..}}}}}}
d "Yeeouch!"
You hear the studio 
audience applaud.   
.}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}}
...}}}}}..........}}
.}}}}}}........@...}
}}..}}}}..d.......}}
}}...}}}}........}}}
}}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
Dogley drops a      
scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone,
With many a scalding tear and many a groan,
When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand,
Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand.
I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd
Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd--
I caught a finger: but the downward weight
O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate
The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst
The comfortable sun. I was athirst
To search the book, and in the warming air
Parted its dripping leaves with eager care.
Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on
My soul page after page, till well-nigh won
Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied,
I read these words, and read again, and tried
My eyes against the heavens, and read again.
        [ Endymion, by John Keats ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
labeled READ ME. }}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}} ...}}}}}..........}} .}}}}}}........@...} }}..}}}}..d.......}} }}...}}}}........}}} }}}}}}}}}}....}}}}}}
d "If anyone wants me, I'll be over at paxed's."
Inspired by Mordae's comment at http://nicolaas.net/dudley/index.php?f=20080605;
see also http://alt.org/nethack/dudley/?262.


http://sadowl.com/dudley/
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@sadowl.com!
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Rating

00244
Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 10

Comments

Mordae June 26, 2009 05:20
First comment: 14 January, 2009 9 comments written
Heh, I didn't realize I was inspirational. Of course, a joke about lighting farts probably wasn't on my mind at the time :)
Quint Sakugarne June 26, 2009 11:29
First comment: 13 January, 2009 139 comments written
This is better than I thought, especially after doing the research.

Rated G, because it would have been E had Dogley not given us this response to the events that transpired.
Slandor June 26, 2009 11:40
First comment: 6 April, 2009 96 comments written
I don't know if this is what Quint is talking about when he says "the research," but all the things Dogley talks about actually have come up in Dudley's Dungeon. Well, stretching a point or two.
Eskimo June 28, 2009 22:35
First comment: 1 February, 2009 30 comments written
I'm really having a slow Monday. Ah, now I get it. The READ ME is only just that... Needed Dogley's comment to figure out the never mind.
solidsnail July 1, 2009 03:48
First comment: 1 July, 2009 1 comments written
Relativity Theory? Existentialism? History of India? HTML?
As for Greek mythology, just because it is the HealerI swear by Apollo the physician, and Aesculapius, and Health,
and All-heal, and all the gods and goddesses, that, according
to my ability and judgment, I will keep this Oath and this
stipulation -- to reckon him who taught me this Art equally dear
to me as my parents, to share my substance with him, and relieve
his necessities if required; to look upon his offspring in the
same footing as my own brothers, and to teach them this art, if
they shall wish to learn it, without fee or stipulation; and
that by precept, lecture, and every other mode of instruction,
I will impart a knowledge of the Art to my own sons, and those
of my teachers, and to disciples bound by a stipulation and oath
according to the law of medicine, but to none others. I will
follow that system of regimen which, according to my ability and
judgment, I consider for the benefit of my patients, and abstain
from whatever is deleterious and mischievous. [...]
        [ Hippocrates' Oath, translated by Francis Adams ]

PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our
dogs when well.
        [ The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
questMany, possibly most, Tours are organized as a Quest. This
is like a large-scale treasure hunt, with clues scattered
all over the continent, a few false leads, Mystical Masters
as game-show hosts, and the Dark Lord and the Terrain to
make the Quest interestingly difficult. [...]
In order to be assured of your future custom, the Management
has a further Rule: Tourists, far from being rewarded for
achieving their Quest Object, must then go on to conquer
the Dark Lord or set about Saving the World, or both. And
why not? By then you will have had a lot of practice in
that sort of thing and, besides, the Quest Object is usually
designed to help you do it.
[ The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, by Diana Wynne Jones ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
?
I only see a fart joke here.
Mantar July 1, 2009 09:13
First comment: 28 January, 2009 36 comments written
solidsnail: Whooosh!
Slandor July 4, 2009 11:41
First comment: 6 April, 2009 96 comments written
Since you asked (gosh I wish I had seen this comment beck when the comment was on the front pageThese strange creatures live mostly on the surface of the
earth, gathering together in societies of various forms, but
occasionally a stray will descend into the depths and commit
mayhem among the dungeon residents who, naturally, often
resent the intrusion of such beasts. They are capable of
using weapons and magic, and it is even rumored that the
Wizard of Yendor is a member of this species.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
), here are the comics I was thinking of:

Relativity theory: http://nicolaas.net/dudley/index.php?f=20040318

Existentialism and Greek mythology: both http://nicolaas.net/dudley/index.php?f=20060801&q=sisyphus (the existentialism is a little implicit, mais il faut imaginer Sisyphe heureux; also for Greek mythology any strip with MedusaMedusa, one of the three Gorgons or Graeae, is the only one
of her sisters to have assumed mortal form and inhabited the
dungeon world.

When Perseus was grown up Polydectes sent him to attempt the
conquest of Medusa, a terrible monster who had laid waste the
country. She was once a beautiful maiden whose hair was her
chief glory, but as she dared to vie in beauty with Minerva,
the goddess deprived her of her charms and changed her
beautiful ringlets into hissing serpents. She became a cruel
monster of so frightful an aspect that no living thing could
behold her without being turned into stone. All around the
cavern where she dwelt might be seen the stony figures of men
and animals which had chanced to catch a glimpse of her and
had been petrified with the sight. Perseus, favoured by
Minerva and Mercury, the former of whom lent him her shield
and the latter his winged shoes, approached Medusa while she
slept and taking care not to look directly at her, but guided
by her image reflected in the bright shield which he bore, he
cut off her head and gave it to Minerva, who fixed it in the
middle of her Aegis.
        [ Bulfinch's Mythology, by Thomas Bulfinch ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
or the OracleDelphi under towering Parnassus, where Apollo's oracle was,
plays an important part in mythology. Castalia was its
sacred spring; Cephissus its river. It was held to be the
center of the world, so many pilgrims came to it, from
foreign countries as well as Greece. No other shrine rivaled
it. The answers to the questions asked by the anxious
seekers for Truth were delivered by a priestess who went into
a trance before she spoke.
        [ Mythology, by Edith Hamilton ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
would do)

History of India: http://sadowl.com/dudley/index.php?f=20090202

Some basic HTML: http://sadowl.com/dudley/index.php?f=20090114
Slandor July 4, 2009 11:45
First comment: 6 April, 2009 96 comments written
sbeck when the commentback when the comic

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Which character represents stairs down: a way to the next level?

http://sadowl.com/dudley/
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